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Month: January 2010

Crash Blossoms

Crash Blossoms

I’m a bit of a language nerd and I mastered in journalism, so imagine my delight when these two loves of mine collided this week in the “On Language” column that runs in the Times Magazine. Micah and I both laughed out loud as we read some of the hilarity that ensues when headline writers try to cut their words down to the bare minimum — and beyond.
“Red Tape Holds Up New Bridge” is a good one, but we both just about busted a gut when we read that the “British Left Waffles on Falklands.” And we were both scratching our heads for a minute trying to figure out what the headline writer meant to say when “Google Fans Phone Expectations by Scheduling Android Event” popped up in print.

Anyway, I know some of you share my love of a little ambiguity here and there, so I thought I would share it with you. Enjoy.

Image from the Times. Obviously.

Official Endorsement: Charlie and Lola

Official Endorsement: Charlie and Lola

For those who have small children and are not acquainted with Charlie and Lola, I invite you to make their acquaintance. Charlie is an awesome big brother, and Lola is . . . well, Lola is small and very funny. Simon has picked up some of their lingo (he’s always talking about having a “streemly, streemly” — extremely, extremely — “happy birthday”), which we don’t mind since they are some of the few children’s characters we aren’t annoyed by in the least. We can’t make a trip to the library these days without looking for a Charlie and Lola book and I’m fine with letting Simon watch a few episodes of the show at a time on YouTube. They are fun to read, fun to watch, and they aren’t really preachy or anything — they are just kids being kids. I should rephrase that: they are just good kids being good kids.

Pie Bites

Pie Bites

Friday is the day Simon and I make a “special treat.” Today I started out by throwing some flour, salt, and sugar in the food processor. Then I added some shortening and Simon turned it on. And then he added the butter and pulsed it a bit. And then I added the water and folded it all together.I rolled it out with our awesome bubble-gum pink silicone-coated rolling pin, during which time Simon completely lost interest. I thought he would love using the cookie cutter on it, but I was wrong. So I did it.
And I thought he would love spooning some blueberry preserves onto the circles, but I was wrong. So I did it. While he slept. Slacker. But it was probably for the best since it got a little messy when I was pressing them with a fork, and it would have been a complete disaster to let Simon help with the milk wash and the sprinkling of sugar.I was almost thinking it was a waste of time to come up with this project for “us” to do when it ended up just being me, but then dinner time rolled around and he took one look at this risotto I made (ack! it’s green!) and said, “I don’t like it.” And then I said, “Well if you don’t eat it, you can’t have any pie bites,” and so he choked it all down. It took him the better part of an hour to do it, but he managed. And I decided the pie bites were worth the risotto.

The end.

I’m feeling pretty hardcore today

I’m feeling pretty hardcore today

because I:

woke up early and went for a run in the rain.
did the laundry with the boys. in the rain.
did the grocery shopping. with the boys. in the rain.
before lunch.
The casualties included our Costco-sized wind-proof umbrella, which, it turns out, is actually not wind-proof — and my record of never having given Simon a time-out in public. A mom’s got to do what a mom’s got to do. Unfortunately, the time out did not have the desired effect and we ended up carrying two baskets through the store anyway.

Simon couldn’t stop laughing as I tried to turn our umbrella right side in and keep Oliver dry and out of the wind. At least one of us enjoyed the situation, although Oliver was a pretty good sport about being winded and rained on. I finally gave up on the umbrella and hurried us to the laundromat with it inside-out.

And then I sat on the couch and watched episodes of Chuck and Castle on hulu while folding the laundry. Thing 1 took a long nap in his room. Thing 2 took a short nap on my lap. As I finished folding, the clouds parted, the sun shone. And I shook my fist at it.

I'm feeling pretty hardcore today

I'm feeling pretty hardcore today

because I:

woke up early and went for a run in the rain.
did the laundry with the boys. in the rain.
did the grocery shopping. with the boys. in the rain.
before lunch.
The casualties included our Costco-sized wind-proof umbrella, which, it turns out, is actually not wind-proof — and my record of never having given Simon a time-out in public. A mom’s got to do what a mom’s got to do. Unfortunately, the time out did not have the desired effect and we ended up carrying two baskets through the store anyway.

Simon couldn’t stop laughing as I tried to turn our umbrella right side in and keep Oliver dry and out of the wind. At least one of us enjoyed the situation, although Oliver was a pretty good sport about being winded and rained on. I finally gave up on the umbrella and hurried us to the laundromat with it inside-out.

And then I sat on the couch and watched episodes of Chuck and Castle on hulu while folding the laundry. Thing 1 took a long nap in his room. Thing 2 took a short nap on my lap. As I finished folding, the clouds parted, the sun shone. And I shook my fist at it.

Wish me luck. I’m going to need it.

Wish me luck. I’m going to need it.

We’re running the Ragnar Relay this May. It is 178 miles — Woodstock to the Bronx — and we are running it with 10 other people from our ward. It’s going to be awesome.

Except that we have to start training now. And it is cold. And the days are short. And we only have a single jogging stroller — not that Oliver is big enough to sit in a stroller yet anyway.

What that means is that I have to start waking up at 6:00 in the morning so I can go for a run in the early daylight before Micah goes to work. I prefer my mornings to start quite a bit later than that, but I also prefer 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep and that’s not going to happen any time soon.

Wish me luck. I'm going to need it.

Wish me luck. I'm going to need it.

We’re running the Ragnar Relay this May. It is 178 miles — Woodstock to the Bronx — and we are running it with 10 other people from our ward. It’s going to be awesome.

Except that we have to start training now. And it is cold. And the days are short. And we only have a single jogging stroller — not that Oliver is big enough to sit in a stroller yet anyway.

What that means is that I have to start waking up at 6:00 in the morning so I can go for a run in the early daylight before Micah goes to work. I prefer my mornings to start quite a bit later than that, but I also prefer 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep and that’s not going to happen any time soon.

Apparently, I’m in a rut.

Apparently, I’m in a rut.

FHE tonight. Simon is drawing a picture of how to be a good friend on his magna doodle. Micah is watching. I am cooing at Oliver.

“Ooh, what’s this? What’s this?” I ask Oliver, stroking his chubby cheek.

“Chubby cheeks,” Simon deadpans. He doesn’t even look up from his magna doodle.

Micah laughs for five minutes straight.

Am I really so predictable that even my 2-year-old is on to me?

Apparently, I'm in a rut.

Apparently, I'm in a rut.

FHE tonight. Simon is drawing a picture of how to be a good friend on his magna doodle. Micah is watching. I am cooing at Oliver.

“Ooh, what’s this? What’s this?” I ask Oliver, stroking his chubby cheek.

“Chubby cheeks,” Simon deadpans. He doesn’t even look up from his magna doodle.

Micah laughs for five minutes straight.

Am I really so predictable that even my 2-year-old is on to me?